Practicing good manners, being poised and gracious, can mean the difference between success and failure in our familial, friendly, and professional relationships. As children, our first lesson in etiquette was learning to say “please” and “thank you.”. At some point in our childhood, soon after we learned how to form letters with a crayon, our parents began to cajole/require/bribe/insist that we write thank-you notes for presents received.
Note writing in general seems to be a dying art, especially handwritten thank-you notes. But expressing gratitude with a handwritten note says so much more than “thank you.” A written note is tangible evidence that you truly care about the other person, not just the gift given or the thoughtfulness shown to you.
I don’t know a soul who does not enjoy receiving a thank-you note in the mail. To open an envelope that is not junk mail or a bill of some sort is a real treat. A dear friend of mine is masterful at letter writing, so much so that her notes almost deserve handwritten responses themselves. She sets the mark for how I want my expressions of gratitude to read, so they will be cherished, long after opening them.
Writing a thank-you note gives me good feelings as well, because it requires me to reflect on both the giver and the kindness received. Here are a few tips on thank-you note writing:
Keep good stationery or note cards, stamps, and writing pens on hand to eliminate that excuse at the outset.
Express your thanks at the beginning of the note. You can say “thank you” or “It made my day to receive” or “I am grateful for”—just make sure to communicate that you received the gift.
Thank-yous are not limited to acknowledging gifts given, but also to express appreciation for acts of kindness or generosity shown. Write a note when you have been included at a dinner party or a neighbor watered your plants for you while you were out of town.
In professional situations, take time to handwrite a thank-you to someone for an introduction, an interview, an encouraging conversation or other business-related favor. Your handwritten note will foster good will and leave a positive, lasting impression.
Don’t go overboard. Keep the message sincere and truthful. The note need not be long. As a general rule, three sentences are enough: 1) grateful for the gift; 2) how you are enjoying the gift/how the gift helped you; 3) thank them again.
I have decided that this will be my last column, and I want to express my sincere, personal gratitude to TOWN for including Ms. Bea Wright in this gorgeous, well-crafted magazine each month. Four years ago, I pitched an idea about a monthly piece that would offer opinions and advice about relationships, etiquette tips, and an observation or two from a Southern woman’s perspective. Out of a joyful, collaborative effort with editor Blair Knobel, Ms. Bea Wright was born.
Not only am I thankful for the encouragement received from Blair and her team at TOWN, I also appreciate the kind expressions of support from those few who knew Ms. Bea was my nom de plume. Writing as Ms. Bea has been a wonderful privilege and a lot of fun. Hopefully readers have gleaned a tidbit of wisdom or enjoyed a smile or two along the way.
Signing off as Ms. Bea for the last time, I am, gratefully, yours truly.
Y’all behave.
